A Monthly Meditation on Branding and Language From Your Favorite Copy
Shop, Editorial
Emergency
#29 (June 26, 2009):
Hear Us Roar
Welcome to the June edition of Editorializing, in which we ponder the possibility that special writing skills are conferred by womanhood; hazard some perspective on perspective; spin a classic album just reissued on vinyl and a dazzling new collection (which should, in all fairness, be released on some space-age polymer); and burn your retinas with the latest sorry crop of Not Our Clients. It's a must-read for all genders.
How to Write Copy: Step 1, Be a Woman
A while back, I was invited to contribute something called "How to Write Copy" to the
website of a large, well-known women's networking organization with numerous "star" participants and a robust
online presence. However, my contact at this group dropped the ball and the piece was never published. To
assuage my irritation (and for your edification, of course), I'm posting it below. The original thesis was that women
make superior copywriters. But I sincerely believe this "how to" exercise will also benefit not only gay men,
metrosexuals and hopeless bromantics but other male varietals as well. Take that, female chauvinists!
We've known guest columnist Daniel Passamaneck for longer than many of our readers have been alive, and we've always been gobsmacked by his writerly virtuosity. His blog, The Chucklehut, varies wildly from post to post; at times it's convulsively comic, at others deeply poignant and alive with perceptive observations about his fellow humans (including the strangers he studies on San Francisco public transport). It's always a rewarding read, and we urge you to add it to your daily online perambulations.
The following, while a marked departure from Dan's often frolicsome tone, contains sage advice for writers of all stripes (and spots).
Decisions, decisions. Would I devote this Round and Shiny to the reissue of a classic album that lit up my teen years,
I wondered, or to a fantastic new one that makes me FEEL like a teen again? Then it hit me: It's my damn column. I don't HAVE to choose.
We've written before about EMI/Capitol's huge and laudable program of new vinyl pressings from its giant
catalog; well, they just keep delivering the licorice pizzas.
The latest box of treasures to thump
against our front door included Roxy Music's "Country Life," the Beach Boys' "Surf's Up"
and Merle Haggard's "Mama Tried." But the LP that sent me tumbling back to my youth? The 1980 debut
by British ska-punk band the Specials.
With the economy allegedly starting to rebound, some of you will undoubtedly want a little extra help around the office. But even if your budget is severely stretched, remember that salary is commensurate not only with experience but also with ability.
She's VIRTUALLY illiterate!
You can view our latest quartet of publicly posted outrages in the Not Our Clients conference room of doom.
Have you spotted a fireable offense against the language you'd like to share? Touch base at
if we tack it up next to the Dilberts and Cathys in our digital cubicle, we'll send you an iTunes Music Store gift card you can use to download "Take a Letter, Maria," "Temporary Secretary" or "9 to 5" — or even an episode of "The Office." Then again, you can steer clear of this tortured theme altogether and snag some Iron Maiden B-sides. Who are we to say?
Editorial Emergency
puts
words in your mouth.
Assuming
you're a marketer, creative, lifestyler, publicist,
artist and/or do-gooder who wants to connect with and persuade
consumers. We've worked for
these kinds of
clients on this kind of
stuff.
In case of editorial emergency, break glass and call ...
(323) 259-5876 e-mail: surf:
www.editorialemergency.com send checks: 2062 Panamint Drive, Los Angeles, CA 90065
A while back, I was invited to contribute something called "How to Write Copy" to the
website of a large, well-known women's networking organization with numerous "star" participants and a robust
online presence. However, my contact at this group dropped the ball and the piece was never published. To
assuage my irritation (and for your edification, of course), I'm posting it below. The original thesis was that women
make superior copywriters. But I sincerely believe this "how to" exercise will also benefit not only gay men,
metrosexuals and hopeless bromantics but other male varietals as well. Take that, female chauvinists! 
We've known guest columnist Daniel Passamaneck for longer than many of our readers have been alive, and we've always been gobsmacked by his writerly virtuosity. His blog, 
Decisions, decisions. Would I devote this Round and Shiny to the reissue of a classic album that lit up my teen years,
I wondered, or to a fantastic new one that makes me FEEL like a teen again? Then it hit me: It's my damn column. I don't HAVE to choose.
